My story today (which was absolutely not planned, nor even envisaged… nor even possible in the beginning) is the result of a combination of circumstances that should please the worst black cats on the site. However, any good reader of FR knows that some black cats are professionals in this field!
Obviously, as I had planned work on the ground and on board, the number of photos will therefore be limited, and I ask my loyal or occasional readers to forgive me, but something tells me that this will be compensated elsewhere…
It's indeed my worst flight experience at Air France/Air chance in a few hundred flights at home! And if you have to do it in the acute nigger-felino-matouite, you might as well do it well… so it's heavy, very heavy!
The original routing-oh learned suspense worthy of the master who committedNorth by Northwest-is as follows:
AF 7363 - March 20, 2018 - 08:55 BES - 10:15 ORY - A319 (attempted postponement) AF 7374 - March 21, 2018 - 21:30 ORY - 22:40 BES - A320 (not carried over)
In short, my usual RER, without panache, trumpets, crowns or others! All in domestic laundry (i.e. the famous Recaro "ironing boards" seats that give back pain if the flight exceeds 60 minutes)
As a result, I therefore schedule my awakening to an almost decent schedule (a human being should be able to sleep until 9 a.m. each morning), however, in anticipation of an empty hold baggage (I will bitterly regret this one) of 4.8 kg to bring back files (this was the only variant of the initial routing that seemed to me absolutely not to justify keeping awake later to commit a FR by anticipating the flight's working time), I advance my awakening a little to be able to respect the time limit for luggage drop-off…
Episode 01 - The Midnight Demon
So I fall asleep from the sleep of the just by counting the A320… :) Well, rather locomotives: p
Tadadadada the alarm clock reminds me of my various obligations around 6:45 am, and it is still comatose and in half a sleep that I notice to have received an SMS and two e-mails from the ROC…
It was the first dramatic turn of events in what will be a sketch film….
Well, thanks guys, you could have warned me around 11:00 p. m. so I could check in again on the wonderful flight AF 7361 from 06:40… Well no, it was at 3:51 a. m.! In short, 99% of the paxs have no hope.
But the ROC working hard, at 4:40 am (so 50 minutes of reflection to commit this misdeed), I automatically re-routed in joy and good humour on flight AF 7365 taking off at 11:40 and arriving in Orly at 13:00… It seems difficult for the 11:30 appointment and lunch of 13:00, but I would survive it!
Except that in reality I am not rerouted (same ticket number) but beneficiary of a new ticket (I go from KL in 074 to AF in 057)… it does not change anything here from a practical point of view; exchange of ticket or modification of ticket, it is internal tangouille!
So I moved my taxi (which was not yet on the way) and told myself that, for the sake of it, I could enjoy a family breakfast without having to run… which is not to displease me (but my boss will see him crimson red)!
It is therefore at 10:30 am that I take my carriage to reach the nearest airfield….
In fact it can also be 7:30 am, it's just a question of time zone… the other Brest is never very far away:)
Episode 2 - Life is a long quiet river
I arrive at the "ray" with certainly more than 2 hours delay on the original routing but rather happy because the 250 € which are the consequence of this cold cancellation should make it possible to make a small pleasant surprise to Madam:) Sort of a fair compensation for having a husband who sometimes tends to turn into a carrier pigeon!
Some do traffic in salmon; what would we not do for household peace!
So let's go to the Skypriority luggage drop-off where there are two people in front of me, one of whom obviously had never flown since at least the last century… The tail screening attendant being present only occasionally in case of crowds (which seems to me rather intelligent for a provincial platform, if there were not 3 sales representatives who are obviously busy looking after).
In short, lightened by 4.8 kilos, I go to the PIF with my BP….
Having a few minutes before boarding, I take the opportunity to take some pictures for a possible next FR… pictures that are independent of the insured flight but which should be clear due to daylight!
Here they are:
First of all, the English wayGoogle translate by the French general directorate of customs and excise proves that it is the DGDDI that is in charge of border control in Brest-Bretagne and not the border police or the gendarmerie.
Then the procedure for admitting and leaving the Schengen area for zeroes….
Note that you now have the phone and email of the dedicated offices….
And then a new twist comes out….
Episode 3 - General's mechanic
Indeed our flight is… delayed.
I must tell you that the commander of F-GRHE who came from Orly on flight AF 7362 had the bad desire to have a barbecue for lunch.
Anyway, he took a few seagulls from the left engine on landing. Of course, this is not due to anything, but such an "incident" implies certain precautions that cannot be omitted or overlooked. It was then announced to us that, unless there was an unpleasant surprise, it would generally take about an hour as long as the engine was operating perfectly after the event and that the crew had not felt any vibration or abnormal behaviour from the aircraft.
And that's where Buster Keaton comes in…..
I must introduce you to the Air France team of technicians of the day….. From what we have been told by various ground personnel, including the captain who is a barbecue fan, that I believe that I am not a fan of this kind of incident…. They are theoretically two in service today. Except that one of them "forgot" to come without his management knowing why, or having an alternative (we are in Brest not in Roissy). The motive may be perfectly legitimate (illness or other) but it will have its impact on the continuation of what will be a burlesque and rude repetition comic (laughing is good for morale, so this FR should be reimbursed by social security).
So, in the absence ofCharlie Chaplin, only Buster Keaton is there. An officer for Hop, he has been a Canadair qualified pilot for years and has recently undergone training for some Airbus aircraft including single-aisle aircraft. This is good news as Brest is normally served by CR2, CR7, CRK, A318-319-320-321… in short, on paper he is the man for the job!
Thus, the captain requests that the local technician carry out the necessary checks in order to authorize boarding. On that side nothing to say, an engine is still something slightly fundamental for flight safety… for a twin-engine!
Except that… F-GRHB, another A-319, is also on the ground and must operate flight AF 7739 (12:05 BES - 13:25 CDG) and that there seems to be 75% of pax connections to CDG on board, including quite a few long-haul flights. However, this A-319 had the bad idea of landing at 10:18 when it arrived from Roissy and driving on "something"…
The other A-319 (the one coming from Orly and returning there… you have to follow) had landed shortly before (09:55) and obviously the track was not tip top… without me knowing if the two events are related.
The captain of the Roissy flight therefore requests, in accordance with the procedure, that the tires concerned be checked, which may lead to their change.
But our friendBuster Keaton will then rush to the A-319 at Roissy… to confirm after some checks (not fast though) that everything is fine. The other captain (Orly's, you're still following?) went to see whyBuster had deserted the crime scene… Obviously the tires of the other Airbus obviously didn't need anything but some areby the book, others not (and it's an endless debate!).
In the meantime (yes I know it's complicated to follow) it has been announced to the pax an undetermined delay for the Orly flight… becauseBuster finishes taking care of the one from Roissy first… who is starting boarding at this moment.
Panic in some paxes who ask to be re-routed to Roissy. Some will be entitled to it (according to the criterion of the wet finger in front of the Breton sea breeze in a creperie by the sea), the pax of 08:55 (you know the first flight cancelled in the morning?…. whose bibi should have had the joy of sharing the bad coffee) not being obviously not a priority but nevertheless admitted ! In short, some rerouting and then a niet… served on the order of the Lubyanka because the flight is full!
Another twist, we call the loudspeaker 2 pax that are no-show for CDG! Thanks to the no-show, a passenger (a platinum subscriber without checked baggage) will also be re-routed, as the staff has given the stop command in order not to be too late at Roissy. The aircraft will finally take off at 12:37 (+00:32) to arrive at 01:31 (+00:06) with … an empty seat! Rumour has it that some hostesses in uniform were able to take advantage of the jumpseats… GP, Mise en place… the (black) magic of Air France is present!
It is then thatBuster Keaton gets closer to Orly's A-319 (hallelujah my brothers!!!!!)…
But now… another twist!
Episode 4 - Titanic
Indeed, the CRJ d'Hop ! to Lyon (Flight A5-4093, operated by F-GRZH) has a leak problem in the hold or in the toilets (it's a little close in a CRJ)… or in a reactor ! The information will vary according to the interlocutors without me being able to know what it really is (if you read us Buster…)! Buster Keaton, who is ZE spécialist on ze place des Canadair, will then head towards this device that is only waiting for its savior!
Indeed it will take off after repair at 14:05 instead of 13:25…..
But in the meantime (are you following or are you already lost?) since it was starting to smell like mildew for our valiant flight AF 7365 of 11:40… the ground team after having re-routed the paxes with connections via LYS, takes care of the paxes to Paris.
Except that there are only 30 to 40 seats available to compensate for the flight of 08:55 (scheduled in A-319) and 11:40 (also scheduled in A-319) even if some pax have been able to leave in the meantime for Roissy or are on the plane from Lyon….
In short, not everyone will take off before 4pm….
And thereBuster Keaton is joined by the nickel-plated feet….
Episode 5 - A taxi for Tobruk
Indeed, the ground crew reroutes the passengers without any rational criteria other than "you shout louder… you are rerouted". It is something to experience once in a lifetime and which is located somewhere between the agricultural fair of Chateaulin and the auction of the port of Brest…
The calculation is quick: 60 to 90 people, 30 to 40 places… the "get out of my way" has never been favourable to normal and polite people…
So I feel that the mould is getting closer to me with great speed. In short, I'm pulling out my secret weapon: running!
Episode 6 - The stuff of heroes
So I leave the mass of pax that are starting to warm up (well it's very curious, the air transport police have just passed the PIF, just like that at random to walk… and armed!). There will be tears, that's for sure.
[In other words, a way of commenting on the third party to the fullest extent of the box] And it is then that BESMRS leaves the rope and goes outside, towards the PIF that he passes in the opposite direction by slaloming between the pax that appear there; listening only to his courage, he then goes down the stairs 4 to 4 to take the rope in the opposite direction and goes towards the luggage drop-off counter Sky-machin-marketing that no longer goes wrong to arrive in 2nd position !
[pfff 2nd in the trifecta… it's good I'm not good for the wheelchair yet]
In 3 minutes I was re-routed on flight… AF 7369 (14:45 BES - 16:00 ORY)… but I was not given my boarding pass because I had to take my luggage out of the hold, "retaguer" it and then put it with those of the next flight…
On the other hand, I have my new BP, via the AF application in a few seconds.
So I'm going to have a little coffee and just after that I get my new BP, my new baggage tag and go to the PIF…
Episode 7 - Blood and tears
I go through the PIF again… and beep bottle of water… well yes I ate at 12 o'clock without waiting for the crowd to rush to the only post-PIF point of sale. In any case, the treatment will only come around 1.30 p.m. for basic sandwiches. I ate a little better than the basic meal (the staff thought that at noon we could do without the yum yum yum)…
Lightened by a red badoit, I go back to my door… and that's the tragedy. As might be expected, some could not be re-routed and staff only offer them "priority waiting lists". Except that there will be no no-show… for a flight where 90% of the paxes have already passed post-PIF.
And that's where the nickel-plated feet appear in all their splendor: it remains to queue for the rerouting of subscribers and platinum that are and will remain on the floor! While they were originally planned on the flight of 08:55!!!!!
This is then the great thought for them:
With order of a taxi and a TGV ticket for Paris…
If I had not passed the PIF, I would be in the same situation: planned on the 17:10 flight (in Canadair) or the 20:40 flight… see those of the next day if the connections required it (and this will be the case for some who did not want to sleep in Orly).
So, as much as I can understand that VIPs (there were none on these flights), families with young children are re-routed first (this was more or less the case from what I could see even if the wet finger has its limits), planting subscribers and top-stats that have already been planted the same day for the previous flight is totally unacceptable. Two cancellations one after the other… ouch!
Several of my fellow believers will also tell me that the Platinum line sounds more ostentatiously in a void, just to add to it! This is the effect of a strike or in marketing language "France is in the air"….
Episode 8 - The Mummy's Return
And that's when Buster Keaton came back to the scene, who had apparently gone to review his procedures over coffee… in his office!
Oh, a reactor! How it opens…… Oulalala is complicated. We learn in passing that he would not have opened a CFM cover since his formation. I understand that he is opting for an express revision.
(memo for myself: yes I know it's a turnip because the answers are wrong too)…
And that's when another dramatic turn of events occurs…..
Episode 9 - Waiting for Godot…
" Ladies and gentlemen… we regret to inform you that flight AF 7369 from 14:45 to Paris-Orly is announced with a delay of approximately 20 minutes. We thank you for your understanding and will keep you informed of developments"
Needless to say, on that day the airside atmosphere is closer to the "Ah it will be fine, it will be fine, it will be fine…" than the "Everyone, he is beautiful, everyone he is nice…"
Moreover, the gendarmerie patrols between the doors, obviously making a "show of force" (but it is not the Force, it is the Force… in other words, it is not with us, the one we would really need…
To clarify the boxon, here is a view from the back office: the number of "corpses" on the printer shows the number of re-routing (among the 6 stations used to do it).
In order to allow faithful readers to understand a little bit about the progress of airborne operations (which border on the complexity of D-Day)… a small intermediate summary is required! The AF flight Brest-Orly from 08:50 was cancelled during the night. The 11:40 AF Brest-Orly flight is delayed… waiting for the technician's "Go/No go". The 14:45 AF Brest-Orly flight is delayed… with a possible evolution of the situation.
The ground team is visibly overwhelmed by the triple intervention (a tire, a reactor, a toilet or something else) and by the pax management…
Episode 10 - Grandpa makes resistance
But then a new twist will occur… We will learn the reason for the cancellation of the flight of 08:55 (you know, the one that was cancelled to be replaced by the one that is delayed… without really being sure of taking off).
Indeed, this Airbus could not take off from Orly because a preventive maintenance visit was not carried out last night due to an internal strike at Air Chance scheduled when the equipment was properly planned. The ground team did not consider it useful to try to have this operation done on Roissy or by subcontracting when obviously this problem had been known since the day before….
Episode 11 - Transform
In order to add a layer to the various problems of the day, I must inform you that the Brest terminal has two contact positions equipped with telescopic bridges. One is broken (Les Roissy board via the tarmac) and the other is occupied by the Airbus d'Orly which is delayed (thus imposing another staircase access).
This detail (one more) will necessarily slow down the rest of the operations but as we are no longer within 3 minutes!
Episode 12 - The Wings of Hell
And then comes - to your applause - F-GPMA, a third A-319 that will fly Orly (the 14:45 flight, which is officially delayed for the moment to 15:00).
However, the minute of general knowledge seems appropriate here (to be recommended to all TK afficionados:
The boarding will be done quickly (with bibi in almost n° 1 because very judiciously positioned just after a PMR)… then will come the waiting!
Indeed, a new twist is about to come! I know you never get tired of it.
Comment for myself: it's complicated to put parallel events in FR because if you don't try to put some logic it becomes incomprehensible, … what am I losing you for?]
Well yes, you forgot it butBuster Keaton is still in the action. Do not hesitate to follow its procedures step by step at the risk of slowing down the operation which consists of… a visual inspection of the internal elements of the reactor.
So we have: i]Buster, the crew of the left A-319 (11:40), the crew of the right A-319 (14:45) and some airport and AF personnel…
Except that it is so slow that the crew of Orly's A-319 (the 11:40 one) arrives at the limit of time and still does not know if it is Go or no Go. In short, flight AF 7365 will also be cancelled in the name of the sacrosanct precautionary principle.
The proof in pictures:
The classic pitch... classic in row 1:)
Take-off, climb, sweet and sour, beginning of descent.
It is then that the CC (which obviously tried to do the best possible to limit the case) goes around the pax in correspondence with the ad hoc ACARS message. Being in 1E, I have a front row seat: My neighbour on the right has less than 10 minutes to close the doors... with checked baggage (on which he mourns out of habit). I ask if we'"/>
All pax in shuttle connections will not have to pass the PIF.
For the others, ground staff are present before leaving the controlled area to switch the pax between hall 2 and the others (with signs) and in the public area for the others...
Episode 15 - Terminator
Ahahahahahahaha, you thought it was over!
No, I still have to get my empty suitcase back (you know the 4.8 kg that prevented me from flying to Roissy towards the first-second-third-fourth-fifth flight of the day).
Of course it had been mislabelled as a priority (on a servant or it obviously makes no difference to baggage handlers) with its yellow ""/>
In reality the luggage will arrive at 16:39 and my luggage will be in 6th position (with 4 not priority before...) On this one not bad at all. Like what:)
End bonus: for skeptics
quote]Small intermediate balance sheet I will deliberately distinguish 3 things: - the ground in Brest - other flights - the flight operated
Brest - BES
Paris - ORY
It is better to laugh about it than to cry about it. On the other hand, it is indicative of the total lack of solidity of processes and other rules in the event of malfunction. No lessons have been learned from past mistakes. However, it is in the event of an incident that we see whether an airline is really strong.
I would remind you that these are French domestic flights, with a stopover that is considered by Air France to be large enough to justify in-house staff on site, good service and a day without snow or strikes. I can't imagine what would have happened abroad on a 3rd zone field.
A cancellation can happen (even if the reason here is laughable), two for the same pax... no!
Kafka must be the management model at Air chance:)
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