BESMRS flute which recurs… yes but you know me by force, the route and the FR are not worthy of the biggest names of the site… and then the pictures are not my strong suit.
- No exoticism Mogoyesque (like a Tehran - Mullah-land in B 707 prison with MiB in it to make Will Smith look like a garden gnome and Nicolas Cage like his sidekick),
- No statistics bordering on the law of large Marathon numbers (like a Roissy - Arlanda RER-style A320 whose board occupations will be catering origami and the testing of all the special menus available),
- No Okapian recklessness in the search for the most twisted Skyteamesque combinations on Paris Milan with an espresso ristretto on arrival and smuggled sausage in the hold,
- No decadence of the "gang of 4" with an experimental world tour in Première with 257 varieties of Champagne on 39 companies with 26 different types of equipment… 28 lounges and not to mention the 18 kinds of zero-rated caviar :)
No, it's basically pure French-French domestic Y by Air France.
I know it sends a dream right away!
Except it's bibi, so if there's a postponement it's because there's something to postpone!
The reason for the routing.
Well, I'm on holiday (on paper at least, in practice I had to complete 3 files (plus a few other things) before last Friday which were sent to me on Friday itself, so in practice I'm not on holiday yet… one day I'd have to explain to my boss - glory be given back to him - that leave is not equal to half-time). I'm not going alone to the other end of France leaving my little family, it's actually the other way around: the family coming.
Except that the great-grandmother (who is approaching 90 years old with a good eye) cannot travel alone by plane. Even if Air France offers it (a partner comes to pick up the pax at home, helps them close their homes, takes them to the drop-off and then entrusts them to the stopover for further processing), my little finger tells me that it will be complicated.
So brave as I am, I'm going to look for the great-grandmother who lives in Provence and then bring her back (and then it'll still be some XP for the good cause).
The basic routing therefore appears to be purely utilitarian: BES-MRS-BES (it's okay, you've understood the reason for the nickname? :))… Except that…
Except that a person of nearly 90 years old does not appreciate multiple connections and PIFs: so exit them via ORY (PIF gadget almost guaranteed on invoice except extension of Hall 4 or Hall 2 South), or via CDG (3 kilometers on foot, it wears out, it wears out…), or even via LYS (the art of going around a building to return to its point of departure), remains direct flights.
To come from the West of Provence to Brest (or vice versa), there are several solutions…
Volotéa operates a Montpellier - Brest route 2 or 3 times a week. They are people who are normally frequented. Except that the last time they found it funny to divert the flight to Nantes to complete their rotation without exceeding the crew stop because of the fog on Brest (ahahaha the good joke, the ILS was functional and the Air France planes landed without problem). An unexpected arrival at 10:45 p.m. in Nantes with a baby and an oral care scheduled around 1 or 2 a.m. at best did not really leave me a good memory in an empty terminal where all the shops are closed, including car rental companies. On this one I thank the insurance of the credit card: baby slept well (and so did we because the bus that arrives at 4:45 in the morning was niet).
Ryanair operates a daily flight from Marseille to Brest. Already they tend to cancel this flight at the least susceptibility to the probability of potential strike notice from the local DGAC with a treatment worthy of the best Iranian companies reported by Mogoy. Then, according to URSAAF and DGFiP, the president bought a taxi company so that his limousine could use the bus lanes (true)… So no.
TUI operates weekly flights between Toulon and Brest. It doesn't fit because Toulon is a little far away (but well we could eventually make do with it) and the flight days are not always adapted. Otherwise the only criticism I can make of them is that I don't sell Belgian chocolate on French domestic flights…
Stay Air France under flight number Hop! Except that the route is seasonal, aperiodic and never exceeds one flight per day; in short, you must aim finely. With retirement, the great-grandmother has flexible dates. Otherwise it is via ORY, via LYS, via CDG or via LIL… so no!
The routing will therefore be built around direct BES-MRS flights on which the required pre-routing will be added.
This is where the trouble starts:)
The construction of the routing
Great lord, I look at the website of our national company to see what it offers me in terms of prices.
The "multiple destination flights" option gives me the desired combination without any problems with multiple time variants… at full flex rate (about 2000 euros and dust for bibi). No way.
Certainly I could use my subscriber rate but the Yield Management pricers have to stop smoking airport carpet in Singapore (for the thickness) or North America (for the reasons).
It will therefore be necessary to "trundle" the machine by splitting the tickets to obtain correct prices (for example, a BES-ORY followed by an ORY-MRS often cost almost twice as much as a BES-MRS via ORY in full flex). Rail degressivity, singled out by IATA in the post-war period, has left its mark
The Air France site gives me, for a pax, a BES-PAR-MRS/MRS-PAR-BES with several possible schedules and correct prices.
The same site releases the MRS-BES-MRS-MRS at the flex rate, period. Considering the price, I'm thinking it's going to be Flying Blue award tickets. Except that this time around… the FB website offers me the same flights for 28000 round-trip miles (which is both a good and a bad deal).
Yes bug because full flex at 28000 miles is not consistent; the number of miles required corresponds to those of eco restricted fares rather correct for summer bookings made at D-25…
I repeat the same flights on the KLM site: same above-ground pricing; the problem is therefore confirmed to be at AF/KL.
The flight being sold A5 operated by AF (their industrial logic escapes me a little bit:)) I try on the site of Hop (one never knows when the problem comes from a bad communication between AF/KL on the one hand and A5 on the other hand)… Bingo !
134 euros including VAT for MRS-BES-MRS flights per person on a direct flight… or 67 euros per flight: a rather correct fare with one piece of baggage.
So a priori it's good, I found the right price combination: the one that suits me…
Except… traveling on August 16th is less fun than usual: smart buffalo sees red at the very least. It is therefore necessary to avoid the 3 hours of queue in Marseille which promises to be managed with local sauce.
Even if I fear disgust on Mars, I will play it safe and use the "heritage": an "occult" advantage of Flying blue that some on the site know and use… especially to enjoy the culinary pleasures of the KL lounge in Amsterdam (there too it makes you dream).
When a member of Flying Blue issues a reward ticket to a third party, the latter inherits for the purposes of the case a pseudo-status inherited from the reward issuer. Don't see any bug in it: it's deliberate and perfectly voluntary (and it's just as voluntary not to talk about it).
Indeed, studies (old but still current on this subject) show that in a household, there are rarely two frequent travellers but most often one: the spouse is therefore perfectly suited with the children to benefit from miles when travelling on business.
In other words, and following macho stereotypes of commercial coffee, Mr. J travels to an exotic business destination (at the expense of the company) while Madam accompanies him via J miles with the "heirs". That was redder Frequency time and trips to Concorde or space 127. Except separating families is never sexy or selling.
Since then, Air France miles have lost as much value as the Zimbabwean dollar, the Afghani Afghani or the Russian rouble in the name of program improvements that do not improve anything except AF's balance sheet when it is too bad for investors and it is starting to show;)
It should be noted that this analysis is found in the double platinum advantage: if one of the members of a couple is flying blue platinum AND Amex-AF platinum then his spouse is ipso facto upgraded FB platinum (as long as the double condition is met and without possibility of granting through the statutes for life and Ultimate).
In short, as a Platinum, if I issue an award ticket for someone else, they will benefit from some of my advantages. Here the only advantage sought is clear: Skypriority. Access to the Marseille salon is automatically granted because I am entitled to a guest and there is no salon in Brest (scandal!!!!).
So we're going to split the BES-MRS-BES tickets in two: one paying, the other reward ticket.
However, since the flight back to Marseille has a possible schedule (last rotation of the day for zinc), it will be impossible for me to make the return to Brest the same day (and I am too old, um too decadent and a Western middle-class to sleep on an airport carpet like some FRistes). So the return will be done over two days with one night on site.
The good gift: or the routing in the routing.
Except that if you're going to "lose" a second day, you might as well take the opportunity to make a variant of the "status-run".
As you all know, the "last improvement" of the Flying Blue program aims to empty everyone's mileage accounts for the benefit of W/J/P class travellers only and to reduce the number of frequent, statistically low value-added travellers' heu pardon pikes. Logical from a financial point of view, but problematic for many customers, including myself.
The sounds of corridors speak of 5% more elite and a division by three of the platinum…
In the old system I used to cumulate segments (with 95% of BES-PAR segments) using one of my professional addresses in Germany (located there, I really worked there, I have evidence and witnesses, and then it was the German Treasury that paid me… you can do worse as a character witness!).
Now, with the XP… qualifying for domestic flights to maintain platinum status is either pure and simple madness (150 flights per year or 2 round trips per week worked in bulk), or Machiavellian premeditation. However, as a subscriber (for the rare last minute trips) I am entitled to 4 Xp per segment (only 75 flights per year to do) and not 2 Xp. So I would be a little short at the end of December.
Rather than scheduling one or two round trips between Christmas and New Year's Eve for the needs of the cause (at random a BES-CDG-GEN-CDG-ZYR followed by a CDG-BES at 50 euros per flight) which seals one or two days and breaks the back of the official because of the ironing boards, I take note of the fact that some FR-istes go to London for the day for about 350 euros… on D!
Cf. https://flight-report.com/fr/report/33322/Air-France-AF1780-Paris-CDG-London-LHR
Except that a CDG-LHR round trip (between 45 and 55 minutes of flight) brings in 30 XP… compared to 2 Xp for a longer domestic flight at full flex rate (look for the marketing error and you will have come a long way to become AF CEO).
We will therefore add an "XP-run" to all this.
I wouldn't do this status run in the first leg because the slightest glitch would be catastrophic, so I would do it on the second day back.
In addition, it is very convenient thanks to the last AF strike I have a 350 euros voucher that hangs around like magic:)
And there you can all go to the cloakroom of the sandbox of the nursery for premature babies under the incubator: 30 xp for 2.17 euros (located 2.17 euros on my credit card statement and on the ticket) I think I just exploded all the possible ratios…
b]From theory to practice
To avoid unpleasant surprises when you set up complex routings like this without access to professional tools, you have to know how to use them.
A reservation on the AF/KL website can be made free of charge for 24 hours, provided that you use either the mobile version of the website or the smartphone applications. A reservation made from a non-mobile site or that is not eligible for the option is kept for a maximum of 4 hours.
It being specified that now an automaton cancels duplicates (which I find embarrassing, it would have been better to leave a delay of one hour to allow to build twisted routings while avoiding abuses for FB members at all levels).
A reservation on the HOP website does not benefit from this service; it is payable firm and the ticket is systematically issued just afterwards or it is cancelled.
It is therefore a routing that must be created in the following order.
- AF reservations will be issued and blocked for 24 hours (in order: flight to LHR, then BES-MRS),
- the availability of BES-MRS-BES flights will be checked,
- the BES-MRS-BES award ticket will be issued (first because its price depends on the filling rate),
- the HOP BES-MRS ticket will then be issued on the Hop site,
- pending AF reservations will be paid and tickets issued (here the order does not matter).
In short, after a few hours of boiling grey matter (Mogoy tries not to occupy your living memory, I squeeze my brain)… we get to this routing of death :
August 16, 2018 - AF 7361 - 07:10 BES - 08:55 ORY - CRK (operated by A5, sold under AF) in Y
August 16, 2018 - FY 6010 - 11:10 ORY - 12:30 MRS - A320 (operated by AF, sold under A5) in Y
August 16, 2018 - A5 6433 - 18 :55 MRS - 20 :30 BES - A320 (operated by AF, sold under A5) in Y
August 21, 2018 - A5 6432 - 21 :25 BES - 23 :00 MRS - A320 (operated by AF, sold under A5) in Y
August 22, 2018 - AF 7669 - 09 :35 MRS - 11 :05 CDG - A320 (operated by AF, sold by AF) in Y
August 22, 2018 - FY 1780 - 13:25 CDG - 13:45 LHR - A320 (operated by AF, sold by AF) on D
August 22, 2018 - FY 1781 - 15:50 LHR - 18:05 CDG - A320 (operated by AF, sold by AF) on D
August 22, 2018 - FY 7732 - 21:50 CDG - 23:00 BES - - A320 (operated by AF, sold by AF) in Y
All this for 6*4 + 2 * 15 = 54 XP therefore 1/6 of the required for the maintenance of platinum status.
In short it will be good for the 300 points required considering my remaining shuttles to do until December… (you know my Navigo pass zones 1 to 29)…
Another significant advantage is that XP supernumerary points are now retained when you are Silver or more; previously status flights were lost, only status miles were partially retained (which was only of interest to those who were doing P/J at full fare).
Pre-flight
But, as you noted, the two MRS-BES-MRS tickets are separate: so there's no reason for us to sit together: the machine can't guess it (even if the two paxes have the same FB number; it's just not planned).
I will therefore call the Platinum line on August 13, 2018 to have the two files linked so that the check-in machine (which is triggered around 35 hours before departure) can process us together.
2 minutes 36 minutes later, it's done and normally everything is fine.
Except that when the flight check-in opens, nothing will happen as planned….
The BES-ORY flight gives me a 7F (with neighbour), I change to 6A (without neighbour) and ask the AF twitter service to switch me to 1A or 1F which are not selectable.
Refusal on their part because rows 1 to 5 are neutralized for centering; I am invited to see this at the airport (usually this means that they will be reserved for acquaintances if they are unlocked).
The ORY-MRS flight offers me a 9 F (sic). The AF site forbids me to move forward… the KL site will allow me to choose a 2F (with a view of the port of Marseille if approaching facing the West). The 2 Ds and 2 Es will later be selected and I would then move down one rank to have a 3F with no neighbours in my A320 (at least at that time).
MRS-BES flights are not registered. The AF site refuses me the recording. So is the KLM site.
The Hop site will accept it and place us in row 12… in the emergency exit. Except that a 90-year-old person in 12A may be slightly problematic for the rest (I can see her taking her cane to break down the emergency exit on the crew's orders).
So I call the Platinum line because only rows 30 or 31 are available and not necessarily placed next to it.
The line will take 48 seconds to win (record broken, it had never exceeded 10-15 seconds) and a lady with a strong foreign accent is available (but perfectly French-speaking and friendly I would like to point it out). It is August 15, a public holiday in France, and I assume that the call was switched to a foreign call platform.
I explain the problem and she tells me that she has to check whether a 90-year-old person is allowed to travel as an emergency exit. Two minutes later, she confirmed what I already knew. She then proposed row 30 to me.
And then, for the first time, I grumbled. Waiting 20 to 30 minutes to get out of the plane as a platinum because automatic recording did not work seems to me ubuesque if not counterproductive. It is not up to passengers to assume the (regular) weakness of IT.
After if not the choice, not the choice, but I know that some pax will be happy to be free in the emergency exit:)
Great white of my interlocutor who asks to contact her supervisor again.
5 minutes later she tells me that rows 1 to 5 were blocked for centering but that they unblocked row 5 for us. In fact, I expected that the row before or after the emergency exits would be switched to the emergency exit and that we would then have row 11 or 15 (no 13 in AF). Manipulation that I have already seen n times and that generally does not raise any objection.
I receive 1 minute later my boarding passes in 5E and 5F.
Except that my little finger tells me to go and see (he always has good feelings about my little finger). In fact, the supervisor has released ranks 1 to 5. As a Platinum, I can access all the rows, including 1, not my co-pax (Marathon syndrome).
Now suspicious on the Platinum line on a holiday, I try my luck again via twitter by indicating the problem. 15 minutes later we are in row 1… in short we will have space (finally in theory).
Result of the races: the AF application is strawberry-based: as much as the BES-ORY-MRS flights are recognized and the boarding pass accessible, the MRS-BES flight is for absent subscribers (visible flight but not the BP: no problem we will do it the old-fashioned way). (but you will see later that this flight will be far from simple)…
All I have to do now is pack up my things (i.e. put the late job in the bag), finish the late job file (the other one), put the phone in charge and hope to sleep for a few hours.
b]The "yellow peril" interlude
I will also use this routing to "leave" Sixt for Hertz.
Sixt Germany has a partnership with FB for customers from Germany. FB gold = Sixt Gold; FB Platinum = Sixt Platinum. I had a (old) Sixt Gold card that no longer served me too much… Disposing of unlimited Avis /FB upgrades (another hidden advantage of FB: seehere.
In France, Hertz has the AF partnership. Note that this partnership is another hidden advantage of FB explorer members (ex Ivoire); and yes, even infrequent travellers benefit from advantages.
For your information, the Hertz discount codes for FB members are as follows:
FB Petroleum: CDP 558860
FB Explorer: CDP 629733
FB Silver: CDP 963123
FB Gold: CDP 963122
FB Platinum : CDP 567704
FB Skipper: CDP 312237
FB Club 2000: CDP 620788
So I asked to benefit from another little-known advantage of FB status: the conversion of my Hertz Gold reward card into President's circle status (equivalent to Plutonium for them), my card at home being new and blank of any point or history (it had 2 hours).
See thislink.
Contacted by email, their match status department refused to tell me that this partnership was managed by France (they are in the US).
By phone, I was always hung up on me (3 times!)
In short, we'll see what happens on the spot, but it goes bad enough for me to be faithful to them in the future!
When to go there…
Well this morning, the alarm clock must have rung several times before the left eyelid decided to play the opening. Arrival at the airport around 6:45 am, at the same time as the crew.




Head to the Skymediocrity counter to ask to advance to row 1 if possible.
One person in front, 45 seconds later it's my turn…. I present my request to the very polite clerk.
The answer was as short as it was clear: No, sorry, sir, the centering requires neutralizing these rows, sorry, have a good flight…
Knowing pertinently at that moment that there is a 50% chance that Hop will think I'm a congenital retarded hamhead on this one….
Come on, let's go upstairs, honey! For lack of 7th heaven, we will be satisfied with PIF gadget.

Ze PIF de la muerte
With the help of summer hours, the PIF is clear.

I take this opportunity to move forward… in the absence of an attendant! Except that theoretically you can't enter without checking the PO or DGAC card. 3 meters further the return attendant, looking surprised, will see me hand him my BP on the phone with all my stuff ready in the bin… and the relieved look that I am not affiliated with any illegal pharmacy (the knights of the Finisterian Apocalypse, Corsica one day, Corsica still, etc.)
And then, oh miracle of creation, "Mrs. Jefaislagueule", who for the past 5 years has been limited to a systematic and all-military tight hello, has a radiant smile and asks me immediately "Hello, sir, it's good to see you again, are you all right? "… yeah, it was a holiday or what?)
I still beep twice for the random check (I'm still negative, you'd have to put Semtex under my nails one day to laugh) and 2 minutes later here I am in the place symbolizing the decadence of the Roman Empire, the temple of the Balik of the temple merchants, the Mecca of the LPGS and the Krug crystal: the airside area of Brest.
Curiously enough, the non-Schengen area is closed so that customs can invest it at a later date. Does it smell like a holiday flight?
Well the child area is empty….

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

The Okapi break

Let's go see the western end of the Skate…
The beast of the day

General view from the Far West (or west lighthouse in Breton yoghurt)

There are some curious things there….
Enough to train with a telescopic footbridge


Traces of a regular and somewhat unusual user of the tarmac

and yes F-RAJA and F-RAJB often come to the area….
Buster Keaton's van is hiding

The closed door which, if it were open, would allow connections to be made without PIF-bis

Damn it, we're getting on board and late!

It is not raining (well, no more)!

The authorized target! 6A

Except that you will notice that 2 D and 2 F are occupied by a PMR and his companion. The probability is proven: Hop it's still screwing with me.
During the boarding we will take a tour of the owner
The pitch

The moment I'm small but I treat my claustrophobia in an A380…..

The 5F is busy, rows 2 to 4 are also filling up… Melon and Ham, the trip to France by Air France?
Ouch

Re-ouch and the magic button to raise the aisle armrest

We approach the last pax when "Mr. Strong" arrives aka 6 C so my direct neighbour. I don't know anything about this gentleman but his 130 kilometres will clearly be a problem in a CRK…
His wife is in 5 D and spontaneously offered to come to 6A so as not to be embarrassed by her husband (I am very pleasantly surprised).
I'm not saying no… and then the PIL comes. I therefore went to meet the CC who informed me that boarding was not completed. At the indication of my error because I had seen the PIL coming, it marks a hesitation. Two pax late later, I'm allowed to change places.
It will therefore be Justice (with a capital J) and my servant will take his place in the august 1A!
But for "centering" reasons, only two paxes will be allowed to go forward (we are close to the Air Force One protocol)… including bibi?
Breton weather (it has dropped 3 minutes)

The pitch is immediately better….

We drive, line up and screw Orly!!!!!







The ceiling is low!!!!!


Not bad







Then came the tragedy of the century: a workplace accident in flight.
Bibi will work when his red pen runs away. So I go to the toilet, red hand in front.
Seeing me arrive the CC becomes pale wondering why and how! Are we going to have to land in St-Brieuc, in Rennes? An EVASAN? Is there a doctor on board, an undertaker, an embalmer? To my spontaneous indication on the cause of the thing and the access required to the sink, he will be reassured, orf we missed the drama of the year…
Work + survival kit……

From 27 grams

We are not alone
#X-files



Ah, Mogoy's gentlemanly mansion…

Limits

We can clearly distinguish the former Seals line (then PO) and the former State road via Gallardon overhanging the rest of the viaduct
It seems that the whole world envies us our Silicon tray forgives our Silicon tray

The former headquarters of Microsoft France, in the shape of a butterfly

Basically Paris

We are coming: Skyteamchc and Nicobcn's plane (F-HBNG) is boarding

The almost instant Danette

The PIF pass door is closed on this side.

In comparison to the other side

And yes, no choice.

And we'll meet again for the rest… in the public area!
